The real Peter Parker
by Realist Ver1.01
Summary: Alternate lyrics to the 'the real slim shady' in referance to SpiderMan. Now this is version 1.0 so sorry if it doesn't exactly match...


May I have your attention please?  
May I have your attention please?  
Will the real Peter Parker please stand up?  
I repeat, will the real Peter Parker please stand up?  
We're gonna have a problem here..  
  
Y'all act like you never seen a Super Hero before  
Doors on the floor me bustin' in badder and worse than before  
and started whoopin your ass without so much gore  
as in Evil Dead, throwin you over furniture (Ahh!)  
It's the return of the... "Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding,   
Goblin isn't back again like I think he is, is he?"  
And Dr. Ock said... nothing you idiots!   
Dr. Ock's dead, he's died in his basement! (Ha-ha!)  
Symbiotic vermin love SpiderMan {*vocal turntable:   
chigga chigga chigga*} "Peter Parker, I'm sick of him  
Look at him, walkin around shooting his you-know-what  
Swinging through you-know-who," "Yeah, but Weying's cute though!"  
Yeah, I probably got a couple of genes up in my blood loose  
But no worse, than what's goin on in Morbius' cooked goose  
Sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't  
cause' I goota sell my pics to my favourite news  
"My spider sense flashing, my spider sense is flashing"  
And if I'm lucky, I'll kick you in the head and start bashing  
And that's the message that I deliver all the crime  
And expect them not to fight or I'll make them do the time  
But of course they come at me, from front and behind  
So I'll hit them again  
And tie them up with my web line!  
"We all just homosapiens.." Well, some of us homosuperior  
who rip out all these poweres and kill you when near you {*SLURP*}  
But if we can heal ourselves and others  
then there's no reason that a man and another man can't be brothers  
{*EWWW!*} But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote  
Unless it turns you into a big man Spider that grows!  
Chorus: Eminem (repeat 2X)  
  
I'm Peter Parker, yes I'm the real Parker  
All you other Peter Parker's are just Scarlett Spider  
So won't the real Peter Parker please stand up,  
please stand up, please stand up?  
  
[Eminem]  
SuperMan don't gotta have class to sell any comics;  
well I do, so I'll kick his ass and his Super boy's too!  
You think I give a damn about glory win?  
Half of my wins aren't even known of, let alone relished in!  
But Pete, what if you can, I mean join a team?"  
Why? So you guys could just lie to get me here?  
So you can, sit me here next to gritty peers?  
Hell, Ms Fantastic better switch me chairs  
so I can sit next to the door to get out first  
and get to the bad guy so i can hiy him the worst  
You little crook, tried to blast me on Ms Liberty  
"Take this web head" Heck to originality  
I should've let him fall into the sea   
but its not my place to give justice liberally {*AHHH!*}  
I'm sick of you you bad guys screwing up my life  
so I think of leaving when I get into strife {*bzzzt*}  
And now there's at least two like me  
who swing like me; who don't have a buck like me  
who dress like me; walk, talk and act like me  
and just might be the next best thing but not quite me!  
  
Chorus  
  
[Eminem]  
I know I'm like a whiner to listen to, but you would be too   
if you had to put up with Goblins comin' in your living room  
The only difference is I got the powers to fight em   
in front of y'all and I got a cool suit to hide em'  
I just get a new pic and sell it   
and whether Stan likes to admit it {*ERR*} I'm his biggest seller  
better than 100% of you DC folk out there  
Then you wonder how can kids buy up these comics like Pokémon  
And its because I got fight scenes and a morale to build on  
I'll be the only person in the real life fame hall  
Sitting in a frame on the wall and impressing you all  
But now I'm just working and theres bad guys everywhere lurkin  
And every single person seems a super villain working  
To bring me down at MJ's, and I'll fight them there anyways  
{*HACH*} Or in the parkin lot, circling  
Screaming "Spider sence berserking"   
And I owe this all to my Uncle Ben  
Who died before but told me then  
That with all the power you have in the land  
You gotta use it to help all the people you can  
So I won't give it up and I'll keep on being the 'Spider-Man'!  
  
Chorus 2X  
  
[Eminem]  
Ha ha  
Guess there should be some Ben in all of us  
Lets go, lets all stand up!  
  



End file.
